maybe i`m just being oversensitive. maybe i`m just being paranoid. maybe i`m just giving excuses to myself. maybe i`m just over reacting. maybe that`s e way life is.
i should try to become impeccable. i should try to be friendly without being overbearing. laugh cheerfully without being irritating. strike a balance being play n school work. score straight distinctions. be helpful n kind. be more tolerant. know how to console n encourage people. make everyone happy. be musically inclined. be perfect in sight reading n singing. be e solo-ist for every damn concert. be e top student of dunearn. be the model prefect n be perfect in sports. have sportsmanship. be super wealthy n spend e rest of my life donating to organisations n charities. i should learn to be not overly indulgent. shouldn`t reward myself. save more money. study super hard. the list goes on.
i know wut i should be. i know what i can be. but will it make me happy? to be e prototype? what would life really mean to me then? when i die, can i show god my o level certificate with e straight distinctions? can i bring my material goods there? will my friends still be with me then?
i feel i`m not being paranoid. i have my reasons.
i will continue asking rethorical questions n wish someone would be able to answer them.
all i want is to study hard. get straight distinctions. get a clique of friends whom i can totally relate to n be included in. save money and get all e things on my wish list. party after o levels. is it too much that i`m asking for?
i hope i can totally relieve my pent up stress. not over studies. but on other stuff. stuff u wouldn`t know. cuz i won`t share. ahah. i`m gonna keep it inside. unless u ask me la. and i seriously wish i can top e class. seriously seriously seriously. even for eng.
i should really try to start revising n studying.
someone pls tell me WHY things happen the way it does.!.
